Despite what some may believe, we are not locked into one or the other depending on our genders. Here is where I say that the energies of masculine and feminine are human constructs that help us to understand and use them. Throughout time, we have labeled things as male or female with related terminology. Those labels are inadequate to describe the fullness of what those energies encompass. The labels help us to identify when those energies are working through us and help us choose the energies we want to work with and when.

We have both energies within us at all times. They are not separate from one another. The level of them changes depending on our circumstances, attitudes, and beliefs. They blend together and fluctuate. Again it is not dependent on gender or whether or not we recognize gender. The energy is there. We all know men who are “softer” and women who are “harder.” The genders also don’t have an advantage over the matching energy. I once had a boss who told me I had a well-developed male side. I laughed. I still find it funny. It doesn’t bother me that my “male side” shows up when I need it to. We all have instances when we embrace those energies. While we do tend to emulate whatever society dictates regarding expectations for behaviors and attitudes, the energy doesn’t have to. It’s really dependent on what it means to us and how we choose to be.

There are many people who will tell you what it means to be masculine or feminine, but how you act, feel, and perceive that energy depends on what you believe. Case in point. In the US, in general, men don’t cry. Period. They are expected to hold it all in, grit their teeth, and get on with it. Crying is viewed as weakness, and a man should never allow himself to show weakness of any kind. In general, US culture isn’t forgiving of anyone who cries. We are great supporters of “never let them see you cry and never let them see you sweat.” That is perceived as being masculine. To cry would be considered to be feminine and thus weaker. I believe this is one of the reasons women are considered the “weaker” sex. Yeah, yeah, I know, the issue is bigger than that, but a lot of attitudes regarding masculine and feminine energy come from that mindset and are influenced by the roles our ancestors took on and enforced throughout time.

You may have these types of beliefs without realizing you do. For the most part, if you feel you embody one or the other most of the time, it’s to your benefit in the development of your psychic abilities and/or your spiritual progress that you explore the other side. While most people consider them to be opposites, I see them as being complementary. In any given situation, the energies can switch places to ensure the best possible outcome. There are times when discipline and control are necessary, and there are times when chaos should reign. Being able to fluidly move within these two energies and merge them together when necessary can lead us to what we are ultimately looking for, which is balance.

Observe your energy field if you can, do you feel it resonates more masculine or feminine? How do you feel about that? Would you like to change it? In what way? Or are you pretty well balanced? What do you do that helps you maintain it? What can you do to bring out more of it in yourself? Remember that you can use tools to help you. If you are trying to bring up your masculine energy, a kickboxing session might be an option. If you are working on the feminine, check out philosophy or poetry. This contemplative activity allows you to think and feel deeply about something.

If you are an alternative healer, internal balance for yourself is necessary. It’s what helps others find their own. It’s what allows you to point out what that person may be missing while conversing with them, leading them to a greater understanding of themselves and their circumstances. Finding the balance between the masculine and feminine energies within yourself helps you to become a greater version of yourself.

Keep in mind that what constitutes masculine and/or feminine is determined by you. This might also be a direct view into the level of your self-esteem, which can be terrifying for some. For myself, I do tend to be more masculine than feminine in my view, but having recognized that, I try to be aware of when I’m leaning that way too much and choose to “step back” a bit and let things unfold around me instead of trying to control things. I’m better about switching back and forth and merging them more effectively than before. It’s made me a better healer. In conversations with my clients, I start off talking more, and by the end, I end up listening more. It’s made for more satisfying sessions for both me and my clients.

Explore these energies for yourself, discover what they mean to you, and how you can tap into them for your greatest advantage. As you become more balanced, those around you will begin to balance as well from being around you. Neither energy is better than the other, each has its strengths and weaknesses. Both have lessons to teach us. Embrace both with joy and gratitude.