Every person I know at one time in their lives has lived through something traumatic. Some things are more devastating than others, but what might not be that traumatizing to me might destroy the world of another and vice versa. When we encounter such situations, from a shaman’s perspective, we can leave pieces of our soul behind—stuck in time, forever holding the energy of that time and place like an insect trapped in amber, unreachable by the effects of time and nature. Shamans will do what is called soul retrieval to skate the pathways of time to gather those pieces, nurture them like giving water to wilted plants, and bring them into the future, giving them the knowledge that life has moved on and they are allowed to move with it. Those parts of us no longer need to stand as silent witnesses to those events. 

Of course, those pieces bring the thoughts, feelings, and memories of that time. The things we so desperately wanted to leave behind that we were willing to sacrifice a part of our soul to do it. It’s necessary to process those things to be free of them. Some of us never do, allowing ourselves to continue to live life in our fractured state. It’s possible to do. We are creatures of unimaginable power, able to break off large chunks of ourselves and keep going. For some of us, a half-life is the best we can manage, and we do manage. For those unwilling to live life as incomplete puzzles, we must find a way to get those pieces back.

Counseling and other psychological techniques can help some. Shamanic practices help others. Metaphysical practices help more. Each has its way of achieving the goal. The most important part of putting ourselves back together, whether through journeying, inner child work, or shadow work, is acknowledging that such work is necessary. Many of us refuse to accept that something must be recognized. We prefer to dance around it, ignore it, and pretend it didn’t happen or doesn’t affect us.

From the energy perspective, it affects everything. Before I did some shadow work, there was a lot of anger in my energy field. The funny thing was that I never knew it. After acknowledging my anger and actively releasing it, I felt calmer, but that was the only thing I noticed. It wasn’t until later that a long-time friend told me he could feel the difference in my energy, and I understood that it affected me more than I knew. Those sensitive to energy can see, feel, or sense the fear, anger, anxiety, and deep sadness that others carry with them. Those feelings function as a screen in both directions, only allowing that person to see the world through the prejudices of that filter and only receiving the energy of others through it. It functions as a sieve, only allowing that person to send or receive according to the parameters set by the filter. It’s sad to think how many of us live this way, but many do. We do so readily and easily that we often don’t even know we’re doing it. 

Living in this state, we could be considered broken, irrevocably damaged, and beyond repair. Others disagree with this and say that a person in this state is merely wounded and capable of returning to a state of happiness and stability. I say it depends. A few things seem to dictate whether or not a person is “broken.” I’m not referring to a physical issue like a broken bone. To me, that is a black-and-white situation. Either it is whole and unaffected, or it isn’t. Although the state of mind can be affected by the state of the body and vice versa. It can be a factor in determining whether someone is considered broken. 

Belief system – If someone believes their life is over or that they will never be the same after an incident, they are correct. People can only do what they think they can. Regardless of wanting and working toward something, if they don’t believe they can achieve it, the likelihood is that they never will. Beliefs set the boundaries for what we think is possible. They can also be complicated, such as having a belief that money comes to them quickly while at the same time having the belief that rich people are greedy. In energy terms, this creates a situation where money comes in and goes out just as quickly. No one wants to be labeled as greedy. In short, if someone believes themselves to be broken, regardless of how others see them and the proof presented to them, they are.

Attitude – Being an optimistic person can change the energy of everything. We all know a person who always has a smile on their face and a kind word to say. They are always able to find the best in a bad situation. These are the people who face things head-on with a smile and a straight spine, ready to take on whatever comes next. I heard a story once about a man who got into a car accident and was in bad shape. When the paramedics came to get him, he told them, “Work on me as if I’m going to live.” That prompted them to do their best, and in the end, he survived to tell the tale. Those who look at the world with a “silver lining” attitude fare better when things get rough. They tend to bounce back faster, or they don’t “fall” as hard.

The other thing to consider about being “broken” is that there are levels. Some people shatter, others only crack. By a simple definition, these states are not whole, but they make a difference in how they view the world, the options and choices available, and how connected they are to the rest of the world. Traumatic experiences have the undeniable ability to separate us from all that is familiar to us. It can radically change our view of ourselves, our world, and everyone and everything in it. Trauma can break through beliefs and attitudes, shattering the carefully constructed creation that is our lives and tossing us into a world where nothing makes sense.

But does that mean we are broken? No, and yes. Again, it depends on what you believe and what kind of attitude you hold. We have to recognize that we will never be the same when certain things happen, but it doesn’t mean we can’t go on to build a life full of love, laughter, and light. Even if we are broken, it can be temporary. People are amazingly resilient. 

When people say they are broken, I’m reminded of the Japanese art of Kintsugi. It’s a method of repairing pottery by highlighting the cracks with gold or silver mixed in. It’s a way of honoring the history of the piece and showing that even things that had once been broken and are forever changed can be made whole again. 

Gather your broken pieces, examine the cracks you think you have, and fill them with gold or silver. Highlight every last one of them. Those imperfections show your wisdom, resilience, and the will to live and thrive. What is broken can be made whole again with help, hope, hard work, and a hell of a lot of glue.