Regardless of your circumstances, everyone needs boundaries. Things they consider acceptable and things that are not. This can get tricky because the lines can be drawn in places that others don’t understand. They can also be drawn in places where even we can’t explain why the line is there, which is a problem. Some of us are so used to our boundaries being invaded by the actions and words of other people that we don’t give it much thought. We walk around feeling like we’ve been run over by a truck but don’t do anything about it. Situations like these make us feel trapped, constricted, and confined. Not the best conditions for good mental, physical or spiritual health.

Some of us feel so beaten down by others that we’ve forgotten what autonomy feels like. The constant feeling of walking on eggshells is nerve-wracking. Nothing makes sense, and you drive yourself crazy trying to figure it all out. Even if someone gives you an explanation, the explanation itself may not follow any train of sensible logic. You begin to wonder if you’re having a nightmare, or you’re part of a massive prank by the universe, or you’re the one that’s crazy. Could it be that you’re missing something that others find glaringly obvious?

Many of us like to say we have boundaries, and we all do. The issue is when we have a boundary that makes no sense even to us. It’s hard to communicate boundaries to others when we can’t explain them to ourselves. We might have allowed our sense of logic to become so skewed that we’ve convinced ourselves that it does make sense. Except it doesn’t when weighed against the circumstances in which it applies.

Think about the boundaries you have. Do they still serve you? Are they for your highest and best? If not, why not, and what would you like to have in its place?

Others won’t like it when you set boundaries. It means they can’t run over you. Having boundaries means you have decided where the line stands and that you are prepared to defend and reinforce that line when someone comes to push up against it. If you have decided this is a hard line for you, you can’t back down when it’s tested by someone else. If you do, whoever has come to test your resolve will understand that you’re not as resolved as you thought you were and exert more pressure to get you to do what they want. This is the mental process of boundary setting, and it can be hard, but also allows you a sense of freedom you might have never known before. Many articles and videos online can help you set those boundaries to make you feel stronger and give you a sense of empowerment.

My intention here is to focus on setting energy boundaries. Everything I spoke about earlier also applies to your energy field. I mentioned narcissists before because they usually, not always, fall into a category often referred to as energy vampires. Being around an energy vampire can sap your strength. It makes you feel tired and drained. They are literally taking your vitality from you. If that energy vampire is also a narcissist, they can also break you down emotionally and mentally. Learning all you can about the behaviors and techniques they use and what you can do to counteract them is definitely beneficial.

On to the energy part of our program. Everyone knows someone who stands too close when they’re speaking to you. It might be a cultural thing. Some cultures like to speak almost face-to-face. If that’s the case, you will have to politely tell them that speaking to someone at that distance makes you uncomfortable. The reason it’s uncomfortable is that they are invading your personal space. Most people don’t realize that personal space is made up of your aura, your energy field.

We need to step back when people get too close to us because their energy field and ours are merging, and we don’t like it. With people we like or want to get to know, we move closer to them to share their energy. We will often expand our energy field to get closer to other people. It’s unconscious. We will bring our energy field closer to our bodies when we’re in crowded places like elevators or trains to ensure we don’t blend with strangers. To help establish an energy boundary, think about using an energy shield. Think of it as having a coat for your energy field. It sits outside of your aura and fends off any energy you don’t want to connect with yours.

Some people have very strong energy fields and don’t have any trouble establishing energy boundaries, but most of us need help in that department. Maintaining a super strong field around us is difficult because we’re human and live real lives. Your energy field can become weak if you’re tired, sick, depressed, anxious, or overwhelmed. When that happens, your energy system can’t fend off anything. Other people’s energies can stick to us, making whatever is happening with our minds and bodies even worse. That is the reason for energy shields. They can protect you regardless of what’s happening around you and prevent major breaches of your aura.

This is something that most practitioners choose to ignore, thinking that their practices are enough to protect them from whatever they encounter. Maybe, maybe not. You won’t know until it’s too late. My philosophy is that it’s better to be prepared than scrambling to fix something but to each their own. Whatever you choose to do, make the choice consciously. Don’t allow your circumstances or other people to decide for you unless that’s what you want; that is a choice too. One I personally don’t advocate for, but you do you.

Think about the boundaries you have or don’t have and do what is necessary to give you the sense of safety, security, and respect that you deserve. It all starts with establishing boundaries.