This is a phrase that pops into my head occasionally when I get stressed out and want to start ranting. It’s a reminder to me to keep whatever feelings I have about the situation under wraps and know that it will go away faster if I don’t give it any energy.

The universe helps us manifest what we want, whatever we want. The powers that be understand our thoughts, words, emotions, and energy. The things we most focus on are the things the universe says, “Oh since you’re thinking about it a lot, that must be what you want.” If the thing we keep thinking about is something we don’t want in our lives, that is what the universe will continue to create for us.

It’s understandable that when you’re in the midst of something unpleasant that all you can think about is what is happening right now. It’s hard to think about anything else. Unfortunately, when you allow yourself to submerge in an unpleasant situation and stay there, the Universe brings you more of it.

The way to get the Universe to change directions is for you to change directions. You are in the driver’s seat. You get to direct how things go and what manifests. All the things you are currently experiencing are from the energy you already sent out. How you view that is based on your perception, and in widening your perspective, you might see that things aren’t as bad as you think.

I recently met a woman named Elise, who has been living with excruciating pain for years. I said years. Every day she lives with soul-crushing physical pain. Speaking with her definitely changed my perspective. Some people have a high tolerance for pain, but to have it fall into the “nearly-screaming” category all day, every day, boggles the mind. What I’m getting at here is that your situation could always be worse. This is not a pointed reminder that you should be grateful for what you have. This is a suggestion to expand your perception. Things could always be better, but they can always get worse. What makes the difference is you.

One of the buzzwords of the past few years is narrative and how everyone is trying to control it or change it. That is exactly what we’re trying to do here, change your narrative. You might ask if it’s possible, but I can tell you with certainty that it is.

Cancer. The dreaded word almost certainly spells death for the person receiving the diagnosis. I have two friends who were in life-threatening stages of the disease and changed their endings. Both are alive, well, and living on their own terms. Those are extreme examples, but they are good ones.

How the heck does one change the narrative and, thus, the direction of your life?

Energy.

Simple answer, hard to do, but possible. Whenever you feel frustrated, angry, fearful, or whatever, before you start ranting, take the energy and convert it by purposely seeing yourself at the end of your situation. See yourself smiling and laughing. Feel how comfortable you are knowing that everything worked out to the satisfaction of everyone involved. See if you can visualize what a satisfactory end would look like. Include locations, what you might hear or smell, and temperature. Make it as real in your head as you can. Thank the Universe for making it happen as if it’s already happened. Such as, “Thank you, Universe (God) for my amazing life. I’m so grateful for the happiness I have now.”

While you’re thinking and feeling sentences like this, don’t think about your current circumstances. Don’t say things like, “Thank you for getting me out of that hellhole of a place.” That is a mixed message and could make the Universe think you want to be guided toward another hellhole. Make your statements as sincere as you can. Hold this position for as long as possible. No one is expecting you to be perfect and hold it for an hour. That’s unrealistic. If you can only manage five minutes, that works. Anytime you feel your current situation getting on your nerves again, pull out your perfect images and live the dream.

Good or bad, whenever we think about something in a concentrated way, we send energy to it. Often when it’s something bad, we send so much energy to it that we can make ourselves sick. Then we think about how sick we feel, and then we end up sending energy to that as well. When energy flows to something, it makes it stronger. If we want situations to mean nothing in our lives, we have to stop sending energy to them.

It used to annoy me when I asked the older generations of my family what happened with a situation long ago. They would refuse to talk about it. They would tell me it doesn’t matter and to never mind about it now. I’m not talking about if something happened to someone, that kind of information they would give me in a heartbeat. If I was asking about why two cousins still weren’t talking to one another, they would tell me to let it go. It was something between the two people, and they would either work it out or not. The rest of us would mind our own business.

Now that I am older and understand energy. I can see how that tendency helped them. If they suffered hardship of some kind, they only spoke of it when necessary. From an energy perspective, that makes perfect sense. To talk about something over and over reinforces the energy of that event and tells the universe that you’re interested in more of it. The universe considers our constant thoughts about something as pushing that thing to the top of the priority list of things we want.

What is on your priority list?

If you don’t know, now is a good time to find out. What has been happening in your life? Good? Bad? Good can become great, and bad can become better. It all depends on where your attention goes, as that is where your energy flows.