Nothing will kill your spiritual aspirations faster than expectations. I take that back. Entitlement kills much faster. I can’t speak for the rest of the world, but I’ve observed in the U.S. that some of us carry around an impressive list of expectations about how the world works. If they come upon something that doesn’t jive with the list, most are happy to revise the list and carry on. Then there are those who consider it a personal affront when their expectations are not met and fall into the black hole of entitlement where there is no light, no sound, and no logic. There is only this cold, life-absorbing, self-centered being who claims emphatically that it is the center of the universe.

In the everyday world, having expectations is reasonable to a certain degree. It’s not unreasonable to expect that if you ordered a hot coffee that when you get it, it’s hot. In the world of metaphysics, it’s also okay to have some expectations. It’s when the list gets very specific that you can run into trouble.

The universe doesn’t work according to our schedule. It has its own agenda and far surpasses anything contrived by us. I’ve seen people who claimed to be spiritual get angry that they couldn’t do something or failed to progress in some skill. To me, the answer is either that’s not what the universe wants you to do, or it’s not time yet. I would suggest that they keep plugging away at it, and eventually, the answer will become apparent. Most people on the spiritual path understand that divine timing and our own aren’t always in sync.

Then there are those who think it’s okay to get demanding about it. Why can’t I hear my guides? I did everything I was told to do, and I still can’t hear them. Why do I keep attracting negative entities? I do a clearing on myself every day. On and on it goes. It’s an instance of their will being thwarted, and into the black hole of entitlement they go.

I could answer most of those questions with reasonable answers, but once entitlement kicks in, there’s no point. As I’m not one to listen to adults throw their version of a temper tantrum, I usually find a reason to be elsewhere. I’m not apologetic about it. I normally say I have to go, and I leave with no explanation. Life is too short for that crap.

Why am I telling you this? Don’t. Be. That. Person. Everything happens when it’s supposed to happen. If you’re not progressing in something, it’s because something in you is not ready for it, or you have a belief that says you can’t have it. Your spiritual journey is not an external process. It’s internal. Inside you. If you need someone to blame, start with yourself. Although I wouldn’t recommend it as blame and shame only make you feel bad and doesn’t actually change anything.

As you roll along on your path, some things are going to be easy, and other things are going to be challenging as hell. That’s life. It’s also the path you chose whether you know it or not. Challenges are meant to push you harder, move you further, and cause you to stretch farther than you thought you could. They are not punishments or payback or retribution for something you did. They could be, and you can use muscle testing to check for that, but it’s not likely.

The best way I have found to continue to develop skills is to allow the universe to take me to the next person I need to teach and learn from. I don’t have any expectations about it, or I try not to. There are some things I wish I could do, but it’s up to me to get ready to be able to do those things. If I don’t, it won’t happen.

If there is something you’re working on that you’re having difficulty with, here are some things to think about. Why do you want to do whatever it is? Is it because it’s something you truly want to learn, or is it a status thing? I know it seems odd, but there are some metaphysical people who like to rattle off their list of accomplishments as if having all the titles mean something. Not that it doesn’t, but I’m a practical woman. If you want to impress me, I want to see you use what you have in action. The point of impressing me is where the rubber meets the road. Don’t tell me about the degree you got that specialized in the Divine Whatever. Show me how what you know will help your clients. It’s a radical concept, I know, but there it is.

Think about how you intend to use this knowledge or skill. Are you an accumulator/sharer of knowledge? Do you plan to use it to enhance the healing or lives of your clients? Is it for the sake of personal development? Why you do it matters. If your heart isn’t in it, the universe knows. You can lie to other people and even to yourself, but not to the universe. Are you doing this because it’s on your expectation list of things you should know how to do? If so, toss that list out now. Not everyone is the same. Not everyone has the same skill or uses the same skill in the same way. Having an expectation about something and then not being able to achieve it to the level you assumed you would only lead to disappointment.

Disappointment then leads to becoming discouraged. Don’t do that to yourself. This is the spiritual path to enlightenment. It should be walked with as much joy and gratitude as you can manage. Releasing expectations allows you to see the other possibilities being presented to you. That doesn’t mean you will never achieve whatever you were hoping for. It means something else is more important in the grand plan. Go with it, and don’t be surprised if the thing you were working so hard to achieve later on becomes so much easier. If you keep fighting this process while waving your list of expectations at the universe, you will find out how deadly expectations can be to your spiritual progress.