Over the past few years, the universe has been teaching me a lot about endings. I’ve never liked endings. No one does, but I especially don’t like them. Years ago, there was a TV show with which I was obsessed. It had a good long run, seven years. At the end of year six, I stopped watching, refusing to watch the last season. Why? Because I didn’t want it to end. Even now, there are some things I loved watching that I feel sad that the show was cut short, and there are some things about the characters that I will never know.

It seems silly to feel this way about a TV show, but when I was growing up, it was one of the few points of stability I had. I still feel awkward about shows I like ending, but I now force myself to watch them to get the full picture of what the writers intended. At some point, I figured out that if I wanted to jump back into that world, if only for a brief time, I could. That’s what makes DVDs and streaming services so popular. We can go back to our favorites again and again.

So my anxiety about endings regarding TV shows is better, but that doesn’t work in real life. Over the past few years, there have been many changes for me. Major changes, life-altering ones. Along the way, I’ve gotten rid of things I didn’t need and didn’t want. That applied to people as well. I’ve let go of more people in the past ten years than I have in all the years prior. I’m about to do it again.

I’ve read somewhere that if you want to see how well you’re doing as a person, look at your friends. At one point, I felt like I was doing well in that department. I remember thinking that I could do anything I wanted because I had people who loved me no matter what I said or did. Not that I was planning to be a jerk, but because I would always have support. That turned out to be not true. That was a painful realization, and for a person who doesn’t trust easily, it was devastating.

I was not a bridge burner. I am now. I have burnt so many bridges or let them fall so deep into disrepair that to try to reconnect would cause what little there is to crumble to dust. I still have friends, but I no longer have a best friend, and I think, for now, that’s best. There is too much instability in my life currently. It’s better not to get too attached.

This brings me back around to endings. I didn’t like that to start something, something else had to stop. To gain something, I had to give up something. Every damn thing in my life is like that. It’s annoying. I’ve always hated the phrase, you can’t have your cake and eat it too. Then what the hell is the point of having a cake you can’t eat? There are always trade-offs, for sure. Sometimes we consider the trade-offs worth it, like getting a new job after leaving a terrible old one. Then there are times when it doesn’t feel so good, like ending a relationship, because too many things have created a gap that can’t be bridged.

In those instances, before you go skipping off into the future, even if you are excited about the future, take the time to let go, and release the situation and maybe even the people associated with it. The energy of that stress will follow you into your next chapter if you don’t. You will always have that unresolved energy with you. It becomes part of the “baggage” that everyone carries. It also still holds your energy to that time, place, people, and situation.

Find some time to release all of it. As I’m writing this, these are instructions for myself and my current circumstances. Write a letter saying whatever you want to say. Get it all out, good, bad, swearing, name-calling, whatever. There is no censor here. You don’t have to be politically correct, and don’t worry about spelling or grammar. No one is going to read it, not even you.

Make sure you direct all that energy into the letter and are not sending it out to that person, place, or thing. This is getting out all the negative energy you hold surrounding your situation in a controlled and contained manner. If you project that energy outward, the universe will take it as a sign that you want more of it. Don’t do that to yourself. Confine that energy to your letter to be released when it’s finished.

The important thing is that when you’re done, don’t read it. You’ve just put down that baggage, don’t pick it back up. If you read the letter, you will feel those feelings again and absorb that energy back into yourself, which defeats the purpose of writing the letter.

If you’ve typed it out on your computer, when you’re done, erase it. I don’t care if you’ve just spent an hour poring over every word, every nuance. This is the releasing part, the part that frees you from the burden you’ve been carrying and will continue to carry unless you do this. Erase it. Watch every last word blink out of existence. If you’ve handwritten the letter, you can burn it, tear it to shreds, or soak it in salt water until the paper and everything on it disintegrates. You can use a bowl of water minus the salt as well, but salt has extra cleansing properties and adds power to the intention of releasing. Again, don’t read it. I can’t stress this enough.

Even if you are currently in a tough situation and it’s not close to being over, write the letter and release it now. It will give you more strength to continue the fight still to come. When it really is over, do it again to give that negative energy the final kick it needs to get out of your life.

Letting go of things, people, and places that are no longer moving you toward your highest good needs to happen. If you don’t, you are allowing them to hold you back. If you feel stifled and trapped, that is your soul telling you that things must change. You are in spiritual distress and likely in mental and physical distress as well. The universe is telling you that change is necessary. You might not know how the change will come about or even how things will end up. Allow the universe to show you the way. Your job is to let go of whatever is going on now to make room for the better thing the universe will bring you. You can look forward to the future more easily when you embrace the beginning of the end.